Parents can help children manage anger through guidance, modeling, and support.
For many parents, navigating a child’s anger can feel challenging, especially as kids develop their emotional skills. Angry outbursts can be the result of minor frustrations, like disagreements over screen time, disappointment with a parent’s meal choice, or other everyday misunderstandings. As children are still learning to process emotions, it’s natural for them to express their feelings in ways that sometimes feel overwhelming, and teaching proper anger management skills is tough. Understanding these behaviors is the key to helping children learn effective coping strategies. A recent survey highlights the struggles that some parents face, with one in seven reporting their child’s anger appears more intense than that of their peers and two in five parents noting that anger has led to negative consequences, such as conflicts with friends or disciplinary actions at school.
Anger is a normal emotion that everyone experiences, but for children, managing anger can be especially difficult. Emotional regulation is a skill that requires guidance and practice, and without this support, children may face challenges at home and in social settings. Parents play a critical role in helping children recognize and control their anger. The study points to acknowledging that anger is okay, but certain reactions, such as hitting or yelling, are not. Teaching children that it’s alright to feel angry while providing them with tools to express it constructively helps them build emotional resilience.
Interestingly, seven in ten parents in the survey acknowledged that they themselves sometimes struggle with handling their own anger. When parents openly demonstrate effective anger management, it provides a valuable model for children to learn from. For instance, when parents feel frustrated, they can verbalize their feelings calmly, say, by explaining that they feel upset, but are going to take a few deep breaths to reset. These simple actions serve as live demonstrations, showing children how to handle strong emotions healthily.
Many parents in the survey mentioned they had not received any guidance on teaching anger management. Schools can often play a supportive role in this process. In fact, over half of parents reported that their child’s school offers some form of anger management assistance through teachers or counselors. However, less than half said the school shared relevant strategies with parents. The gap between home and school highlights an opportunity for schools to involve parents more closely, perhaps by providing workshops or sending home materials that outline effective anger management techniques.
The survey also revealed that certain strategies tend to be more successful than others. Many parents reported positive results from encouraging their child to try calming activities when they feel angry. Suggestions such as counting to ten, practicing deep breathing, or focusing on a positive thought can help a child regain control over their emotions. Physical outlets like squeezing a stress ball, drawing, or taking a quick walk were also beneficial. Some children respond well to tactile methods, like tearing paper or molding clay, which allow them to release tension in a controlled way. These activities provide children with alternatives to acting out and show them there are many ways to manage frustration constructively.
Addressing anger isn’t just about calming down in the moment; it’s also about understanding what triggers it. Children often react with anger when they feel disappointed, scared, or unheard. When parents take time to identify these triggers, they can proactively help their child avoid situations likely to provoke intense emotions. Setting routines, ensuring children get adequate rest, and avoiding overscheduling are common preventive steps that can help reduce a child’s anger triggers. By being proactive, parents not only help prevent outbursts but also teach children the importance of self-care in managing emotions.
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Some parents may struggle with managing children’s anger, poll suggests
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